Monthly Archives: June 2011

No Thursday fun!

Loads of places will be closed today and so I’ve decided to have a strike too. It’s nice and sunny so I’ll be in me deck-chair with a pot of tea. I dunno what I’m on strike about, but later, I’ll think of something.

Wednesday sun-fun!

Yessss! The sun is out in force again and is cracking the bloody flags as flags on our High-Streets, it seems, are no longer needed.
Deary me, some jobsworth mentions that banks are still not lending to business – yikes, how friggin’ last-decade can you get?
Megalomania-funding costs are knocking-out shops like skittles down an alley!
Not to mention the upped anti that the Feds are after.
And most laughed when I opted for a deck-chair…
…and the sun’s golden warmth.

Tuesday fry-up fun.

It used to be a Monday really when the weekend’s food left-overs were chucked in a frying-pan with a cob of dripping and re-heated to eke-out yet another staple British meal – or two.
As the country literally fries in thirty-odd centigraded degrees of sunshine I thank the bloody lord I’m a ‘fry-up’ recalling wrinkly.
Soon the whole place will be relying on such cost-effective fare as the cost of simply pitching a semi in the once proud isles and living off the fruits of the land (coal, iron, tin, lead, spuds, corn, cars, ships) will be a total non-starter. Out of that top o’ me head list only the backyard growing of a few (well hidden from revenuer’s eyes!) potatoes is still regarded, not perhaps as viable, but as at least something to shove in a fry-up that you can, when starving, eat.
All other available cash will be systematically ploughed back into the drains of europe. The financial printing presses won’t be able to keep up!
But for those like me, remembering the green fields of England and the gentle Monday stench of re-heating bits of Sunday pork or well-done beef, mixed affordably with old and now mashed roast-spuds – even perhaps an egg – I shove-in today’s picture of a one time common sight in England.
A field of cows.
You got milk from them to put on your cornflakes, which they used to call, The Sunshine Breakfast!

Monday fun yet again!

Monday again and this one, here, is already as warm as a TV chef’s language!
What do you wear, if you’re a man, in this type of weather?
Whatever I had on yesterday, inside the house or not, I was sweating cobs.
But there are, for the comfortably deck-chaired, one or two giggles this morning. Europe staggers along making nothing but buying all it needs from a still weird and wonderful China – who, as the rot of ages finally sets in – sends the cash back to buy Euro ‘bonds’??
And ‘The Middle-Classes’, apparently, will have to start stumping-up about £50,000.00p to pay for their ‘old-age’ care.
Good grief, is that all? Most of the present ‘Middle-Class’ are being filched far more than that, yearly, to pay for someone elses!
What, I wonder, will happen when this present, all-funding ‘Middle-Class’ has gorn to that great care-home in the sky and even that moderately lucrative clutchable straw, one of the final ones left for the revenuers, self-extincts.
Easy, a new financial printing-press – Made in China!
I’ve decided, after much reading of the Euro farce, to take, what is increasingly being hailed as a ‘Greek Holiday’.
No, I will not be travelling, trendy hold-all in hand, as I kneel inside some airport to pray for a ‘No-Strike of Airport Staff’ passage to that land of ruins and sun, (and old buildings) instead I’ll be simply dusting-down the deck-chair in the back-yard and sitting in it – but with a glass of something cool, wet and long. (Normally, with our Lancashire weather, it’s hot tea!)
The term Greek Holiday of course means that rather than grafting for a tax-generating, country-funding, fifty weeks per annum, and then holidaying for two, I’ll do a bit for a week or two and then sit on me arse fiddling the bloody books and emptying wine bottles for the other fifty!
Today’s pic is of blogger and petrol-head extraordinaire Mr. J. Clarkson. He may look a little down but the brilliant Top-Gear began its seventeenth series yesterday! A superb achievement for the presenting trio and their back-room staff.
Lately though, although still ‘news’, the gas-guzzlers do get a ‘bad’ press and affordability tends to sway TV watchers if not the sales of such cars themselves.
Strangely, when my wife’s sisters, and there are quite a few, are together in any number, the conversation, after that of a few male film and TV stars, often settles on….wait for it…
Even my wife, a non-driver, has a reasonable knowledge of what’s viable, economic and trustworthy, albeit small-scale, in today’s personal-transport market. Her sisters all drive (and work) and very cost-effectively too.
So there might be a thought-glimmer for one possibly a little ‘hacked’ by things, once again, ‘today’ as, in that public-viewed and popularised world, ‘freshness’ is the breath of life.
Get a woman Jez – one that knows her cars!
A pipe beats those fags any day too!

Sunday fun.

A fine and sunny Sunday morning, but as usual all might not be well. Energy suppliers, govern-mental folk etc. are cottoning-on to the fact – much mentioned by the online bloggers – that without wind turbines are useless. Oh, shock horror!
So the idea now is that the tax-payer is heavily filched yet again to pay for – wait for it – ‘back-up’ gas-powered power-stations!
Then, I suppose, based on fifty years experience of such waste, they’ll want nuclear (?) back-up for the gas-burners!
You don’t really need back-up for nuclear – if that goes belly-up it’s friggin terminal!
Ooops, literally, back to square one!
They’re after that nice Dragons Den ‘entrepreneur’ again. He’s (allegedly!) paid his own companies tax-payer cash.
Anywhere else they’d call that ‘getting your own back’!
And, just to chuck another few £million away; after the Olympics there’s to be a (£94,000,000.00p) ‘art show’ or something. Search me, but this country must be awash with the bloody stuff!
So I’ll proceed accordingly!

Saturday fun.

It’s supposed to be really hot here according to the well-funded weather folk but it’s not.
And another, similarly fed, expounds, scapegoatingly perhaps, that the biggest threat to (GB) recovery is a Euro meltdown.
Meanwhile, canny ‘owners’ of the RAC turnkey operation, seeing the way everything ‘car’ is (not) panning-out, ditch it for readies. Why not, when over half of everything you pull, after some mega salary deductions, ends-up funding not so far-off lands.
Not to mention kitchens, bathrooms and bedrooms, which are, right now, just that bit harder to get!
Any ‘recovery’, or non-recovery, will have nothing at all to do with anything ‘europe’ but everything to do with deck-chairs. Or, rather, the ability to profitably, just sit in one!
Today’s picture is of potato plants. You prepare a well compost-enriched bed, plant suitable ‘seeds’ in it – in neat rows for ease later – then sit-back and watch.
Sun is good. Rain is good.
And later, as a reward for all that graft (?) the profit is extremely tasty!
To cultivate many such beds is recommended!

Friday fun.

It’s definitely deck-chair weather here this morning with a really good sunny start.
A troll around the ‘news’ web-sites gives the day some early laughs with bail-outs, busting companies and, interestingly for such rags, the news that several isolated tribes that have been ‘located’ in the bloody Amazon!
Yes, govern-mental officials have ‘found’ about 200 folk – near the Peruvian border – living in (superbly built eco-friendly) wood and leaf huts (of mansion size) existing on (growing their own quite easily) corn, bananas, peanuts and fish etc. and without any form of taxation/political bullshit.
In total about 2,000 folk, in seperate tribes, are thought to be living in this manner.
Doubtless the powers that be will devise a way of taxing them at least to loin-cloth levels!
JKR leaves her deck-chair for an hour or two to set-up a new web-site that will deal, in detail, with all things Harry Potter. Just off Adsense she’ll be able to do her weekly food shop and more!
And why not? In order to eventually bring us dear young Harry JKR must have put the bloody hours-in (she did), and now reaps her reward. She’s knocked-out about 18,000 words just for the web-site and that’ll need updating so it’s all only work folks.
Mind you, word-count, isn’t everything. Especially when trolling the other Amazonian jungles…
The picture today is of the ‘Festival’ at Glastonbury – in need, it seems, of a bail-out!
Rumour prevades that upon seeing this, (via their Blackberries) umpteen thousand Amazonian jungle-dwellers shook their heads and began to instigate Border Controls!
** Apparently one Amazonian Jungle Dwelling deck-chair enthusiast is offering, on a weekly basis, holidays within his tribal homes.
You’ll live in a hut, get-up at five am, go hunting for food, climb trees for coconuts, and swim in crocodile and snake infested lagoons to hand-catch Piranha for supper. Nerve-settling home-made ‘Moonshine’ is available, nightly, without prescription but with an antidote, from one of the tribal Little Inns.
You’ll also pay no income tax!
Bookings are, apparently, crashing-out his web-site: www.Hut L’Inns.Jungle

Thursday fun.

That nice Mr. Clegg wants to give me a shedload of shares it seems. A nice thought perhaps but they’re not much use just yet.
You have to hold them untill they go-up to a certain level, then you can sell and keep the ‘profit’. But then the initial £1,000 share ‘value’ goes back to govern-mental vaults.
Anywhere else they’d call that money-laundering!
And you’ll be taxed on the ‘profits’ (if there are any!) and there will be (undisclosed!) commission(s) to pay.
It’s supposed to be a way by which tax-payers can be ‘re-funded’ for the bank bail-outs. So by rights it should only go to folk that, at the time of the bail-outs, were paying tax!
That should lower the ‘customer-base’ by a good 75%!
And who will do the ‘paperwork’? Most folk in the public will be on-strike anytime now!

Wednesday fun!

I’m a bit late today as Firefox (yes I’m stone-age here) decided to update etc. so I think I’m in the 2000’s now. It doesn’t look any different so perhaps it’s just a shedload of spam that’s gorn into my harddrive. I’ll sort it later!
There’s not really much fun about but certain folk are on about ‘Quantative Easing’ again. I.e. they’ll print rather than borrow to pay their way for a few days!
Meself I like the harder way of doing things. You know, selling something. But that, apparently, doesn’t work anymore – and it’s easier just to make (well, import?) a few bank-notes!
Mind you govern-mental borrowing was £1.1 billion down last month so a few might not have got their Giro’s!
Pic above is of a football-pitch at York that’s been ‘jobsworthed’!

Tuesday fun again!

There is quite a bit of fun about, if you look.
Some m.p.’s – not medical folk you notice – say we should get twenty minutes of sun a day to guard against ‘brittle-bones’. While medical folk say if you go out use a sun-cream.
What a quandry!
Mind you, here near Manchester the concept ‘Sun’ is a fleeting one. So, if need be, I’ll nip out, tend me spuds in me mac and with me umberella as I always have!
And I’m sure there’s not much wrong with my bones – in fact at times I feel I could offer meself as a temp. to our council – for the (published today!) ‘going-rate’ of course! (£1,250 a day!)
Expensive? Oh no, the council doing it say they don’t have to pay pension contributions, holiday pay, and worry about redundancy pay so compared to what they’re used to it’s cheap. But to camouflage the story they shove-out guff about sunshine and brittle-bones!
I love the concept of ‘Marketing’.
Not for me here to really define it but some research bods at some (funded) uni have done research into what they construe as Marketing; they’ve done a study on folk doing their weekly ‘food’ shop online via the big supermarkets (see, ‘Marketing 🙂 )
Of course they conclude that ‘We’ are fed-up with doing it online, and ‘we’ are going back to normal footslog shopping.
Their research was published in some European Journal of Marketing – that fact alone should ring the warning-bells!
This ‘article’, obviously an advert placed by the big supermarkets, was expected as folk ditch expensive travelling and corner-shop or buy evermore from online sources. When my online ordered shopping is delivered the roundsman (and, he tells me, his mates) is always happily very, very busy with many ‘drops’ both done and to do.
That, folks, is on the spot, nitty-gritty research based on facts and not the whims and fancies of sheep – and as such is worthy of publication here and not in some bailed-out Euro magazine. (It also did not cost any tax-payer one penny!)
Whenever I see ‘we’ in a headline I suspect some real, underlying, propagandic Marketing! I’m usually right.
I’ve always been a fan of fictional detectives like Sherlock Holmes and Hercule Poirrot. In fact, for fun mainly, I have jotted a few half-baked stories in that genre myself.
(It’s absolutely hissing-down outside! So much for sun-cream.)
So today, as I read that real-life detectives, armed with all that DNA equipment and a veritable army of boffins that know how to use it, can solve real-life crimes within an hour – just as their TV counterparts, I begin to feel that old concept – so familiar to those of elderly ilk – again creeping closer…
Not for me, but for the DNA detectives, TV or otherwise. For without ‘me’ their hi-tech, wondrous lifestyles are un-affordable and always were.
For years I’ve listened to women bleating about ‘equality with men’ particularly in the workplace.
When offered it regarding the pension age hell it seems, hath no friggin’ fury!